Parents Raise Your Child Through Childhood, Then Rely On Your Child When They Reach Adulthood
There has been so many times in my life that my parents have bailed me out. I have had a difficult childhood, been rough getting out in the real World, and moving forward to goals I have had in the past. My parents have been there even when I did not ask. I have been there for them as well, but perspective is different from a person’s point of view.
When I Was A Child
I do not want you to think I had a bad childhood because of my parents. I have had it rough in finding friends, getting out to go places, and getting good grades. My biggest stress when I was a child was all the classmates I had harassing me everyday. I thank God for the friends I did have and they were there to back me. Looking back at those times in life I have learned one needs to stand for themself or they will be taken advantage.
I think one of the best things my parents did for me was teach me responsibility. Today I use it in my life and at work. I was given chores to do everyday. I did not think it was fair because I did not get paid an allowance. I always argued that they got paid to do their work, why don’t I? I still believe that children should get an allowance to teach them about budgeting and not wasting money. Although I do not think it should be for doing chores every day. When one is an adult they do not get paid to take out the garbage or wash the dishes. They are responsibilities to life. One being responsible is what a child needs to learn. Unfortunately it did not hit me until I moved out to go to college. That is when my childhood came to an understanding to me.
My sister always had pets, yes many pets. She learned responsibility by taking care of her pets like they were her kids. If you are a parent and your child wants a pet I will advise to get them one. I do not think you should get them a dog or cat to start off, a hamster will do.
When I Got My First Job
Things change in your life when you earn a paycheck. I remember my first job. It was at an Assisting Living facility. I was a dishwasher and helped serving on Fridays. When I got my first paycheck I wanted to go spend “my money”. I felt like I made an accomplishment for the week. I quickly started to learn to save money for expenses. My mother told me since I had a job I had to pay for the gas for my car and anything I wanted when I went to a basketball game. I understood and kept the money I needed for the week.
When I was getting eager to go to college I found a job that I could get more hours and better pay. I started at McDonald’s and I liked working in fast food. I mainly worked in the kitchen. I also did closing and during the summer I opened. It let me learn more about people and food safety. Starting life off is much more simple when it is in the past. It seemed complicated 20 years ago.
I did get harped at quite a bit from my parents about doing chores, my homework, and not watching television when I had things to do. Taking on more responsibilities in life falls all on you. There are ones in your family who should support you. I do not like or approve of all the lectures I got as a child. I have learned a lot growing up. If one yells or speaks negative to their child it tears down their motivation. The first thing most people will do is not listen. They will not do their chores, not study, and start talking negative. I am not saying to let your teenager do what they want, you need to teach them to prioritize. Prioritizing takes a positive attitude, so you need to talk positive. Here is an example:
Do not say- “You work and play those video games too much you will never get into college.”
Do say- “You are doing good in school. Your grades are B’s and C’s. I know you will get A’s and B’s if you put your mind to it. I will help you do a little more studying.”
Now in the “do not say” I blamed the video games. If it is not the video games I could blame Facebook, hanging with friends, or talking on the phone. It does not matter. It is denying responsibility that a parent has to take care of their child in their education. Also telling the child they will never get into college will bring them down to the bottom and they will give up all the hardwork they put into studying. Maybe the parent does not want their child to be successful because the parent was not successful.
The “do say” is encouraging. First thing is showing support that they are doing a good job and making the effort. “I know you will get A’s and B’s if you put your mind to it.” is an encouragement to do even better and it is followed by support by offering help. An offer is not an obligation. If your child does not ask you for help they may be getting it at school or being a little more serious. Are they spending more time studying, than on their video games?
Positive speaking and positive thinking affects you in life and at work. You need to focus on being positive because it makes you more productive. It also helps people around you feel better. Negative thinking brings you down and everyone else as well.
Working In Adulthood
Now that I am in adulthood I know about going through financial issues, helping friends, having stupid roommates, and the bills that we have every month. I always thought being an adult was awesome, it is but has responsibilities. We grow up everyday in life and we find another responsibility we need to do. Some can be a major one like monthly bills and others can not be a responsibility like going out to dinner with a friend. We all need to prioritize what is the most important in our life as far as financial. The everyday bills, food, rent, medical, and insurance are some of the most important bills. If you pay for cable and Netflix then you should pick on or the other. Look for better deals for your internet, car insurance, cell phone, and groceries. Just remember “A dollar saved is a dollar earned.”
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