Complaining About A Problem Without Proposing A Solution Is Called Whining
When I was a child I would complain over the smallest thing. I complained about food I didn’t want on the table, not being able to go outside because of rain, and my sister’s annoying pets. As an adult I realize that life is short and it is better to be happy than it is to complain all the time. But is there a way to complain without being negative? Well here is some advice I have learned in the last 20 years.
Why Should I Not Be Able To Complain About What I Do Not Like
I know there are many reasons why people complain everyday. I do it too. We all get frustrated from work, life, and family and then we let it bottle up inside then eventually we have to burst. I have been guilty of this for years and I am trying to change.I learned about four years ago that negative “vibe” can cause neurological damage. Here are just a few reasons why we all need to be nice to each other.
Programing Your Brain
You may not think so but we are like a computer. Just think a moment your parents and their parents had fun playing outside with sticks and rocks, right. We had fun with video games, computers, cell phones, technology. The first video game you picked up does not matter if it was Atari, Nintendo, Playstation, or Xbox you were being programed that this was the way to please your brain.
You synapses fires each time you have a thought. It registers throughout your brain. The more you do it the easier it becomes for your brain to process it. A little like upgrading. Pretty soon your your synapses gets so close it becomes a habit to you. What can this do to you?
This can be good and bad. Let’s go back to the video game. They make you happy, but you develop a habit not to play them constantly everyday. You play for an hour and spend the rest of your day with family, doing chores, paying bills, and even dishes. Well your brain will develop this as a good thing and it will be for making you happy and being productive.
What Goes Around Comes Around
My life has changed so many times it has been confusing, on top of that my changes in emotions. I use to be a manager at a fast food restaurant. There were good days and bad days. One day I made a connection that when I was around my Assistant Manager I was in a bad mood. The reason being she was always negative and I was positive. When I realized this I started looking for another job.
The point is when one is negative it causes bad moodiness, negative thoughts, and depression among people that they are around. If you are a positive thinker and hang around negative thinkers do not do it. You will not help them they will hurt you.
Stress The Big Hardship On Your Body
Stress is not good for your mind nor your body. I have had a lot of stress in my life and even been through mental therapy a few times. One thing I have learned is that stress cause physical problems like obesity, increase risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, lower the function of your immune system, and a whole lot more. When I learned this I decided to focus on positive things in my life and eliminate negative things. Not all problems have been solved yet, but I am in progress and that is the positive side.
Problem + Idea = Solution
If you made an assumption I like mathematics you are right. Everyday we have problems, but who adds an idea to the problem? If there is no idea then there is no solution. It is that simple. Why start an argument because you do not like something a family member, friend, or roommate did? Offer an idea. This also places you in a positive position because you are being giving and compromising. Now do not be giving alternatives. I will give you an example. You and your roommate are going to a movie. You both are determined to see the movie you want, but only one has the money. Instead of getting into an argument about what movie you are going to see because you are the one paying setup a solution. The problem difference in movies and pay week, the idea compromise, and the solution arrange an agreement that when a roommate gets paid they decide the movie to watch and pay for the tickets. No arguing allowed if you do not like the movie just do not go.
You may not think that this is a good solution, but when it comes to mathematics there can be many variables. Things can change so we need to let the friend know ahead of time. Also you hear at the last moment do not get mad assume that they found out at the last moment too. Getting mad over something that happens in someone else’s life because you cannot go to the movies is selfish. Do onto others as you would have them do unto you.
27“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.
32“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Neurological. (n.d.) In Dictionary.com. Retrived from http://www.dictionary.com/browse/neurological
J Stillman. (February 29th, 2016) Complaining is terrible for you, according to science. Retrived from http://www.inc.com/jessica-stillman/complaining-rewires-your-brain-for-negativity-science-says.html
Luke said, “But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,” (New International Version, Luke 6:27-36)
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